Sunday, June 14, 2009

Jesus doesn't want people to be left handed

Grace: Mommy, I am right handed, right?
Me: Yes, you are right handed.
Grace: What "handed" are you?
Me: I am left handed.
Grace: Why are some people one way and some people the other? How does it happen?
Me: Well, it's just the way you were born. Some people are born left handed but most people are born right handed.
Grace: That is not true.
Me: What?? Why would you think that is not true?
Grace: Nana (my mother) told me what really happens.
Me: Really. Well, what really happens then?
Grace: Well, see, you go to this class and learn about Jesus. Then, they make you be right handed. You are right handed because the Jesus class makes you be right handed.
Me: Well, I am sure that is not what Nana said. Jesus, I am sure, does not care what hand you use.
Grace: Yes sir! That is the truth.
Me: hmmmm.

So, I call my mother and ask her what, in the name of right handed fiesta Jesus, she told her grand daughter. Apparently the conversation revolved around my Dad going to Catholic school and how those mean nuns hit left handed kids with a ruler until they wrote right handed.

However, in our house, Jesus makes you right handed. And that, is that.


  1. Makes sense. Jesus tried to make my cousin right handed, but my aunt didn't much care for that and promptly told "Jesus" (aka the nun) that her daughter was left handed and that is that. I think my aunt is tougher than JC!! Oh, this is Christine by the way.

  2. I thought that was you with your new pastime! I went to your page to try and follow your blog, but I couldn't. Either that or I just couldn't figure it out. Entirely possible either way.

  3. Are we talking regular Jesus, or Fiesta Jesus here? Because Fiesta Jesus definitely prefers left-handed people.

    Squanto is left handed. 'Nuff said. ;)

  4. does that then, conversely mean that the debil makes you left handed? if so, can someone send a priest and some holy water my way, because i have a kid that needs an exorcism.

  5. Well, the debil just doesn't have a school dedicated to ruler slapping left handed ways. If he did, well then-I guess we would be in business. Maybe squanto just likes to get hit with the ruler?